I'm pissed.

 Yesterday was a bad day and today is worse. Once I thought, I think it's okie if we're no longer friends. As if I give a care. If you can't control yourself and show me your tantrum, sorry but you're out of my life. I accept no apologies such as: I'm so sorry for what I did to you. I mean I just couldn't stop myself that moment.I was letting out my frustration after such a long time. Just thought I should give you a hint to change.

Bang! Couldn't stop yourself?! Practice self- control. Expressing frustrations?! Not on me! Give me a hint?! You don't freaking scold some other people and say: Owh! It's a hint. That's beyond idiotic.

I also told myself and other people that wanted us to get back (Get back sounds wrong. Ermmm...I should say be good friends again) that I won't talk to her unless she talks to me 1st. 

Before she talks to me, she talks so loudly to the girl sitting in between us. I hate to hear all her nonsense and so I brought cotton to stuff into my ears when she talks loudly again. After that, I'd hum to drown her voice. If YOU are reading this, yes! I brought it just to drown your annoying voice. 

So she talked to me. 1st. Hell I wasn't comfortable at ALL! She sat beside me, was desperate to tell me about her new found boyfriend which they met for only 2days at the YE camp. 

Hey hey hey. I might be super duper interested in whoever guys you have a crush on last time but not anymore. I sounded like I'm interested just because I didn't wanna hurt your feelings or whatever. Hmmm... may be I should stop being such a hypocrite and just tell you straight in your face: I DON'T WANNA KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOU!!!

Ugh. 

Yesterday, I made a huge mistake. I told her about how the head prefect of our school thinks about her. Wanting her to change for her own good. But! She focussed on something else which is joining the i-Challenge. Owh c'mon! Nobody wants you to join. Seriously. 

If you see the way we discussed AND argued about putting you in which team because none of us want you in our team. If I were you, I'd straight away pull out. It'll be MUCH MUCH better for everyone.

 Even you're thick-skinned enough to still join, fine. But I pitied you for they don't tell you what's wrong and act like they're okie. Nobody is okie. You made our lives so difficult. 

You got the chance to join this competition is because Soo Theng's parents disallow her to go. So, you SHOULD go WHICHEVER team that is WILLING to take you IN. 

Instead, you tried to choose your own team and try to kick me as a leader out of my team so that you can be with my teammates. In your dream I'd allow that to happen.

Owh. And in case you don't know, crying is not the best solution to problems. It might help. But it's not gonna solve it. You just make people feel irritated. I mean MORE irritated of you. 

By the way, I really wish you'd read this and don't you even dare to say or try to say that I'm a backstabber or whatever. Because, in your circle of close friends, even not-so-close friends, they all know your horrible attitude but they just don't speak up and continue talking to you. 

Those that talk to you nicely and listen to you, you have no idea what they say about you behind your back. They don't speak up, I do! I don't even give a care about you anymore. 

May be France is really a bad place for someone like you that don't even know your true identity and go with the flow with other culture. 

I'm not a good friend. So are you.